Hurtful Humor and Familial Aggression

Puscifer – The Remedy

I socialize in many ways. One of those ways is hurtful and aggressive humor. Many people misinterpret this as abusive and domineering. Understandably so: insulting someone can be utilized to harm, and harm can be utilized to subjugate.

Nevertheless, when someone is behaving destructively, I openly insult them. Not to hurt them, but to have them reconsider their behavior. I could be polite, and thus avoid their emotional reactivity, by delicately explaining the negative ramifications of their behavior.

That, however, would have negative consequences: should my cohort never face their sensitivities, they would never learn to control them. So, in expressing my concern through insult, I’m simultaneously encouraging their emotional maturation while addressing their destructive behavior.

Further, if my cohort were not emotionally reactive, and understood my motivations and methods, it would be disrespectful to be polite to them: I would be treating them as if they were unalterably immature, and thus permanently untrustworthy – despite our mutual understanding.

To complicate the equation, while politeness is a dialect utilized for soothing the immature, it is also commonly utilized by the manipulative to gain trust: fools trust who are polite them, who make them feel comfortable with their insecurities and sensitivities – unlike myself, whom foolishly attempts to strength them, and thus prevent the possibility of discomfort.

So, two mature people, insulting each other, while aiming at solidarity, is a sort of secret handshake, a confirmation of mutual understanding. It’s a juxtaposition between honesty and deception: honesty – even if hostile – is the medium of solidarity, while deception – even if polite – is the medium of ill-intent.

In totality, while many people find me abrasive, that is due to their unfamiliarity with these concepts, not my ill-intent. I’m often very stereotypically nurturing, protective, loving, and warm. In nearly all my relationships, romantic and otherwise, I’ve given far more than I’ve gotten.

So, having learned that few people will return my efforts, I now need to confirm our mutual understanding of the current subject, before I commit. So, do that. You can find examples of me talking like a mean adult in the Let’s Play [With My Heart] hub.

Paradigm / Philosophy Hub



~ by Louis Naughtic on July 29, 2016.

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