My Ideal Retirement

The Seatbelt – Space Lion

Assuming I find a partner to indulge, and escape wage-slavery before losing my faculties, my remaining desires are pretty boring. If I had spare cash, I’d buy back the house I grew up in, but would not settle there.

The actual home would allow for a humble farm. Preferably in a place with a creek or river that I could build a little mill on; maybe a large pond I could fill with fish, and carefully husband the ecology of. I’d like the seasons to follow the stereotypical models: rainy spring, hot [but breezy] summer, relaxed autumn, and preferably a punishing winter.

I’d get a dog or three, maybe a cat or two. I’ve considered adopting children under these ideal conditions, but lean toward not doing so unless one of my siblings dies and leaves a child behind. My main focus, once I have love, my retirement funds, and my farm to fool around in, would simply be enjoying a quiet life.

I’d, side-by-side with my love, maintain our land, care for the farm’s animals, tinker around with mechanics and woodworking to make useful things for our life, and enjoy my usual entertainments. I’d spend alot of time cooking, to be sure – the things you can do with fresh vegetables are nearly orgasmic… ha, I just gave that statement more thought. Of course, properly cared for animals also result in superior products – the proximity of this statement to the previous statement should not imply a subtle suggestion of bestiality. That joke just keeps giving and giving, huh.

But when that work is done, I’d just casually enjoy art/entertainment and think about life with my love. Living the internet life. Ironically, I imagine I’d also be writing nearly exactly as I am now – casually hoping to gently push humanity toward growing the fuck up. I’d also like there to be places to volunteer near-by, as that social environment is often pleasant.

A simple, quiet life. If my love is opposed, we’d naturally make a compromise, but I find it hard to imagine a better life. Still, I suppose the most important components for me, are merely the freedom to think unhindered by demands on time, access to art, ability to write, and cook. Hmm, I don’t know if I’d be willing to compromise on the farm; I’ll have to give it more thought.


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~ by Louis Naughtic on September 11, 2016.

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