Oooohhhh s***. [Journal 7-31-17]

Delta Rae – Scared.

I talked to Ex-Landlord the other day, after nearly all our business was settled. In his words, the old roomies complaints were “childish” and “stupid.” It’s so nice to find some sanity in the world. Sure, he should have simply evicted them, but I volunteered to move-out at the start. I’m willing to bet that, them being evicted and myself not, would have resulted in their screwing with me; if they would lie about nothing, due to merely imagined slights, what would they do when they felt themselves seriously wronged?

Savages diminishing the quality of my life, as usual. It’s genuinely fascinating watching them react to my mere existence: observing the mechanics of their vile psychology. Anyway, I shared my assessment of those savages with Ex-Landlord, feeling it proper to warn him: that Sociopath is a sociopath and likely ex-meth-user; that Stoner is stoned out of his mind, and thus paranoid, delusional, and irrational. He understood and agreed. I feel pathetic for enjoying the vindication: I feel it best to simply accept I’ll be perpetually mistreated, ostracized for possessing sanity.

Job’s going.. ok. The pace is higher than I want, since I’m simply giving up on succeeding in the working-world, and instead putting my eggs in the basket of professional authorship. To clarify: the job is very physically demanding, and I can get a job wherein I do a third of the work, for.. 7% less pay. But I’ll hang onto it for a month at least, see how it goes. Plus, it’ll keep Landlordess happy, as she knows I wasn’t working the last year, and it made her uncomfortable. Nevermind that she talked to Ex-Landlord, whom stated I always paid on time, and in-full.

The social situation at work is pretty good. The kitchen crew likes me, with the exception of a Spanish sous chef: he’s a bit cunty; nothing overt yet. I think he’s just intimidated by me, as happens. To be fair: with a little training, I could snatch his job away from him, and do it far better. Is it my fault he sucks? The other, American sous, is also a bit standoffish, but he’s figuring out quicker than the other to calm the fuck down. Work hard, and they’re intimidated. Work like a bitch, and get fired. Can’t please idiots.

My body’s starting to cooperate too: less upper-back pain; my brain is relaxing, no longer constantly running on overdrive – I even slept 10 ½ hours last night, accidentally. Desperately needed it. The new place is.. not ideal. The kitchen doesn’t have a vent. So, basically, I can’t do any real cooking without someone getting upset. The nearest windows are out of reach, and behind a bunch of shit. I eat at work, but I’ll have to use specialized recipes on my days off – possibly oven-focused.

Landlordess, whom lives on-site, I’m worried about. I like her, but it seems like she could become unreasonable, resulting in my needing to move. I hope I’m just worrying over nothing, but who knows. Either way, with a stable base, and income, my next move can be a far better one – I really just needed to get the hell away from those savages asap. Though I kinda wish I’d stayed, simply to better understand their lunacy. Not worth possibly being murdered lol.

Seriously, how do normal people stay alive? Codependency, I imagine. Oh, I forgot to mention I’m not allowed to use the in-house washing machine. Nearest laundry-mat is about a 15 minute walk away. That will be pleasant. Still not feeling depressed. Kidney pain almost gone.


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~ by Louis Naughtic on August 1, 2017.

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